Sayings That Should Be on Buttons

 

 


Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.
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Make yourself at Home! Clean my kitchen.
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Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mom?
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Don't bother me. I'm living happily ever after.
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This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
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I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.
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I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
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If I throw a stick, will you leave?
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You! Off my planet
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Bottomless pit of needs and wants.
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Friendly checkout clerk. Thanks for keeping me that way.
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Does your train of thought have a caboose?
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Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
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If only you'd used your powers for good instead of evil.
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Allow me to introduce my selves.
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Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
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Better living through denial.
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Suburbia: where they tear out the trees and then name streets after them.
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I'm just working here until a food fast-food job opens up.
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I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
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I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.
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Don't worry. I forgot your name too!
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Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
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Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
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Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
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Everyone thinks I'm psychotic, except for my friends deep inside the earth.
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Earth is full. Go home.
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I thought I wanted a career . . . turns out I just wanted paychecks.
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How do I set a laser printer to stun?