Aphorisms For Our Time

 

 


Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
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Money can't buy happiness. But it sure makes misery easier to live with.
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Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.
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Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where you
left them to where you can't find them.
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Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.
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It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as
warning to others.
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Ray's Law: You can't fall off the floor.
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Paranoids are people too; they have their own problems. It's easy to
criticize, but if everybody hated you, you'd be paranoid too.
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If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
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A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
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Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
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For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
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Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.
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To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is
research.
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To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your
principles.
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You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
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The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
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A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
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If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried
before.
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Change is inevitable....except from vending machines.