Arachnoleptic fit (n.) The frantic dance
after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
Beelzebug (n.) Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets
into your bedroom at 3 in the morning and cannot be cast out.
Bozone (n.) The substance surrounding stupid people that
stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer,
unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near
Cashtration (n.) The act of buying a house, which renders
the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
Caterpallor (n.) The color you turn after finding half a
grub in the fruit you're eating.
Decaflon (n.) The grueling event of getting through the
day consuming only things that are good for you.
Dopelar effect (n.) The tendency of stupid ideas to seem
smarter when you come at them rapidly.
Extraterrestaurant (n.) An eating place where you feel
you've been abducted and experimented upon. Also known as
Faunacated (adj.) How wildlife ends up when its
environment is destroyed. Hence faunacatering (v.), which
has made a meal of many species.
Grantartica (n.) The cold, isolated place where art
companies dwell without funding.
Hemaglobe (n.) The bloody state of the world.
Intaxication (n.) Euphoria at getting a tax refund,
which lasts until you realize it was your money to start
Kinstirpation (n.) A painful inability to move
relatives who come to visit.
Lullabuoy (n.) An idea that keeps floating into your
head and prevents you from drifting off to sleep.