The Good Deed



A guy just died and he's at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted,
while St. Peter is leafin' through this Big Book to see if the guy is

St. Peter goes through the Book several times, furrows his brow and says
to the guy, 'You know, I can't see that you ever did anything really bad
in your life, but you never did anything really good either. If you can
point to even one REALLY GOOD DEED-- you're in.'

The guy thinks for a moment and says, 'Yeah, there was this one time
when I was driving down the highway and saw a giant group of thugs
assaulting this poor girl. I slowed down my car to see what was going on
and sure enough, there they were, about 50 of 'em harassing this
terrified young woman. Infuriated, I got out of my car, grabbed a tire
iron out of my trunk, and walked up to the leader of the gang, a huge
guy with a studded leather jacket and a chain running from his nose to
his ear. As I walked up to the leader, the thugs formed a circle around
me. So, I ripped the leader's chain off his face and smashed him over
the head with the tire iron. Layed him out. Then I turned and yelled at
the rest of them, 'Leave this poor innocent girl alone! You're all a
bunch of sick, deranged animals! Go home before I teach you all a
lesson in pain!''

St. Peter, impressed, says, 'Really? When did this happen?'

'Oh, about two minutes ago.'