Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand..
You sit on your roof at Christmas time
hoping to fill your deer
You have a complete set of salad bowls
and they all say Cool Whip
The biggest city you've ever been to is Walmart..
Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV..
You thought the Unibomber was a wrestler..
You've used your ironing board as a buffet table..
You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-Mart..
Your neighbors think you're a detective
because a cop always
A tornado hits your neighborhood and does
a $100,000 worth of
You've used a toilet brush as a back scratcher..
You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty..
You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph..
Somebody tells you that you've got something
in your teeth and you